What's the difference between a democratic spatula and a communist spatula?

Like, suppose one spatula was used to flip free-range eggs (the democratic spatula) and the other--the filthy commie one--was used to flip eggs that came from chickens that were raised in captivity. OK would they have sold out to the fascist market economy system that is being manipulated by the Euro and the Yen and the Dollar? If the spatulas go to shrift, will the be absolved of their wrong doing? I ask you. And if the situations were reversed, how WOULD the hens feel about being wannabe virgins? And the spatulas?

Responses, anyone?