I got these lyrics from an old Paddy Roberts album, though I usually use the same tune as "the sick note".
You've heard about the rabbi and the Irish priest
who in things ecclesiastic were opposed to say the least.
They found themselves together at the closing of the day
and got in conversation in a friendly sort of way.

Good rabbi said the padre 'tis inquisitive I am
have you never had a sample of the bacon or the ham?
for I'm prepared to wager that from Tel Aviv to Cork
there's nothing like the flavour of a side of pickled pork.

The rabbi looked around him and he murmured soft and low
He said I will confess to you that many years ago
I had a slice of bacon, though I knew I never should.
Confidentially, the rabbis said, it tasted pretty good.

An now that I have satisfied your curiosity
I wonder, said the rabbi, would you do the same for me?
For though I know, the rabbi said, that you may never wed
Have you never known the sweetness of a woman in your bed?

The old priest whispered softly and he said I'll tell the truth.
It happened many years ago when I was but a youth.
Her hair was black, her lips were red, her eyes were starry bright
and 'twas she said he who led me to the devil for the night.

The rabbi smiled a little smile and slowly winked his eye
he said I'll keep your secret and on that you can rely.
There's just one thing I'd like to say before we end our talk.
You must admit it's nicer than a slice of pickled pork!

(well----- I thought it was funny, anyway!)