The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #78748   Message #1422282
Posted By: GUEST,WYSIWYG
27-Feb-05 - 12:30 PM
Thread Name: Padstow Darkie Days
Subject: RE: Padstow Darkie Days
Yes, and that would be lovely, really. But that isn't how people actually TICK. They (we) react, and then misunderstanding abounds. I bet a lot of people here think they ARE on topic but actually, they are on a subtopic that's running amok.

I think it's a fear thing. In a discussion in person, I would ask each person to quietly name what it is they are afraid of in this topic, and I would ask the others to just listen, take it in, not repond, and share what THEY are afraid of. From there it would all be an entirely different discussion, but it still would be on the topic.

In an environment like a thread, tho, people tend not to get to that basic level first and work from there, but to start from the most outward layer. Then one wonders why it's not going well, as the inward stuff keeps cropping up in disguise.

Just something to consider. If anyone posting everyone in this thread picked ONE other person from it, to discuss some aspect via PM, I bet they both would come back with some very valuable insights about the topic.

I'm NOT saying "you should do this" or "this thread ought to be closed." I'm just saying, if the topic really interests anyone, there is an effective way to get at the issues and obtain some mutual understanding, and having done this myself on a number of occasions, I can recommend doing that.

~Susan