Oh, there's cowpies in the street
I've got cowshit on my feet
Even got it in the cracks between my toes
Yes the sidewalks of my town
Are a cowshit shade of brown
Ain't no doubt, those fuckin' cows have got to go

Oh there's cowshit everywhere
I've even got it in my hair
There's a big turd in the middle of the road
'Cause them cows don't give a damn
Where their excrement may land
They just lift their tails and "Plop!" they drop their load

Well the townsfolk had enough
Of bein' covered in cow stuff
So we met one night and hatched a little plan
We lassoed them cows right then
Stuck em in a big cowpen
An' we waited for the shit to hit the fan

'Cause the feller owned them cows
Said "Give 'em back to me right now!"
But a twenty-buck a head fine was required
He said "Ya'll all go to hell!"
We said "That'll work out swell
Barbecue, and we won't have to light a fire!"