Speak not to me of cow pats, now I pray,
For on them there is little worth to say
And cowpats, laud them how you may
Never outgrow their origins and stay
Where they are landed, caring not and without form;
Listless and odiferous is the cow-pat norm.

Oh, no--enough of cowpats without cess!
I'd rather spend my hours on B.S.
Golden in variety and magic in its reach,
Leave cowpats behind, smelling each to each,
Go forth, mend up your manners and your dress,
And give the world its worth in pure BS.

Giles Shamrock Arlington
A Pastoral Repast in Rhyme
Brown, Wett, Dung and Company
Edinboro, 1913