A Form Leter.
~~~~~~~~~~~


Dear Idiot,

You have been given this citation for being a true MORON because you:

[ ] selfishly,
[ ] foolishly,
[ ] dangerously, and/or
[ ] rudely
[ ] failed to signal to change lanes.
[ ] cut people off.
[ ] tailgated.
[ ] crossed the gore.
[ ] left lane bombed.
[ ] right lane bombed.
[ ] drove slow in the fast lane.
[ ] drove fast in the slow lane.
[ ] don't understand "slow traffic keep right."
[ ] don't understand "left lane passing only."
[ ] parked in a handicapped spot without displaying authorization.
[ ] parked like an $@#%!$!!
[ ] created a new parking spot where none exists.
[ ] turned right on red when traffic was approaching.
[ ] created gridlock.
[ ] rubbernecked.
[ ] threw garbage out the window.
[ ] ______________________________.


You are an idiot because you:

[ ] weren't paying attention.
[ ] were driving while using a cell phone.
[ ] are just an idiot.
[ ] ______________________________.


To remedy this problem, please

[ ] walk.
[ ] take public transportation.
[ ] just stay home.
[ ] get a clue.
[ ] get a life.
[ ] stop breathing.
[ ] short pier/long drive.
[ ] take driving lessons.
[ ] learn how to read (signs, drivers manual, etc.)
[ ] ____________________________.


To ensure your public disgrace

[ ] a photo of your car
[ ] a photo of you
[ ] your license plate number
[ ] a full description of your car
[ ] a full description of you
[ ] ____________________________.

will be submitted for publication (or prosecution) to
the following organization _______________________________________________


Sincerely, The person who
[ ] you cut off.
[ ] you tailgated.
[ ] you generally annoyed.
[ ] keyed your car.
[ ] is going to slash your tires if you do this again.
[ ] you needlessly wasted the time of.
[ ] ___________________________.