The game is afoot! I heard that one of those grand conspiracy guys who finances political campaigns is already financing informal (practice?) Constitutional Conventions.

This time around we're not going to do that blue and grey thing though. I think we're going to have uniforms designed by the "Queer Eye For The Straight Guy" guys. They promise to be far more stylish than the first uniforms were -- PLUS no wool!!!. All that scratchy discomfort won't be adding to the discomfort of war.

And we're promised better food this time -- and absolutely nobody gets limbs sawed off with a dull saw. But we'll keep the morphine. We liked that one first time around and it made for some great folk music like Soldier's Joy.

And I think we'll fight the war via reality show. We'll have teams of four guys chosen to represent both sides. No guns! The goal will be to shame and embarrass the other side into surrender.

It's going to be tough though. How do you embarrass a redneck? ...and have you seen east and west coast fashion? --no way could you embarrass anyone who dresses like that.