Fundamentals of Fish Spoilage??? Betcha that one took lots of Oscars.

My father served in the Pacific Theater.

All this time I've assumed that that name refered to the area of the Pacific where WW2 was fought. I have now seen the light and realize that what is being communicated was that my very own father was not in the Army in WW2, but was actually an usher in a movie house for fish which was located in the Pacific Ocean! And all the other "Theaters" are likewise places where fish watch flicks!

Why, you may ask, has this coverup been going on? Why for the last 60 or more years has the US Government hidden The Truth from the American people (and everyone else, for that matter)?

Simple: tippy top secret US Navy research back in the late 1920s and early 1930s proved conclusively that fish were smarter than people, and the US Government "created" WW2 as a gigantic coverup. The Government, in its wisdom, knew that people around the world would panic if The Truth was told. Instead, in cooperation with the Bavarian Illuminati and the Group of Seven and the Freemasons and the Bohemian Club and the IOOF and the Knights of Columbus (which organizations basically run the world today and always have), people worldwide were subjected to subtle sublimial programming during the movies "Going My Way," "The Song of Bernadette," "Gentle Comrade," "Gone With the Wind, "The Wizard of Oz," and "Steamboat Willie." This programming made everyone think that a war had been fought, when actually fish had quietly taken over the reins of power! Today, fish are in charge in every nation on the globe and are pushing their Agenda. PETA wants a ban on fishing; "Save The Whales" is triumphing; dolphins and porpoises are actually thought to be at least a little bit intelligent, "catch and release" is chanted like some sort of religious prayer -- and if this isn't proof enough, Fish and Game Departments across the globe have set up "limits" to the number of fish which can be caught!!!

Well, now that's all cleared up.