And about those first names: I do not call people over, say, mid-teens or so by a first name unless they ask me to do so, but am very frequently told "Don't call me Ms. ---, it makes me feel old." It still feels very odd to me to address my patients as "Ms. ---" and have them call me by my first name; I still address most of the other physicians in my hospital by Dr. --- and always call them by title and surname in speaking with patients or staff. I also grew up with "Ma'am" and "Sir" and these were well enforced in years in the military, but I rarely hear these terms of address in this part of the country except from my own offspring occasionally. I have been told some people think the automatic use of first names suggests friendliness, and suppose this is why it is popular with salespeople, but I find it presumptuous and annoying. If an unknown person cold-calls me on the phone and addresses me or my husband by a first name, I tend to respond as if I assume it is a wrong number. "No, sorry, (click)."
Judith Martin (aka Miss Manners) points out there is a great deal of difference between
"Oh, Mrs. Wapshot . . ."
"Please, call me Sophie."
and
"Oh, Sophie . . ."
"Please call me Mrs. Wapshot."