Help.

I went to Whitehorse on the WP&Y railroad and a really swell guy bought me drinks and I bought this gold claim he had. Well, it turned out that he owed a little money on it and the debt went with the mine. It was something about mercury and arsenic and water, but I've never been quite sure about it. And there was something about the title, too. Anyway, the RCMP came and I barely managed to escape their clutches. I did get back to Juneau and I took the ferry to Sitka, where I am now. But last night a warrant from the Yukon was served at the...well, they say it's a hotel...where I'm staying and I had to promise pay the money wtihin 30 days. So I've taken this job on a salmon boat as a "slimer" and a second job as a skullgrinder. If anyone would like to help get me out of durance very vile, please send money. Lots of money.

Thank you. I know that MOABites will always come through.