That's not fair, Joe. True, Chongo has a thing for long-legged human females in short, slit skirts. True, he likes to smoke cigars. True, he likes to drink far too much whisky and other such beverages. True, he has a penchant for stroking bananas, and a thing for oiling his tommy gun into the wee hours...but...he is NO pervert! No, indeed.

He just believes that the punishment should fit the crime.