I was afraid this was going to be another one of those threads that was all full of Shambles shit. I'm glad it's not, because I want to talk turds. In fact, I want to complain about turds. And I certainly hope to get some sympathy.

I went to my computer room today to check on the latest developments at Good Old Mudcat, and stepped over the gate that's supposed to keep my stepson's Shih-tzus (shit-sues) from taking their dumps on my carpet. As I stepped over the gate, my foot that was on solid ground slipped from under me - because one of those little shaggy doggies had left me a present outside the gate.

Now, I was all dressed up for a meeting, wearing white pants and dress shoes - but the shoes smelled too bad for the meeting.

So, that's my turd story. I demand sympathy.

Or at least, I expect the kid to clean my shoes. Shambles, get to work!!!!

-Joe Offer-