well I woke up next mornin' feelin'
like my head wuz gone
an' like my thick ole tongue wuz'a lickin'
sumptin' sick an' wrong
an' i told that man
I'd sell my soul
for sumptin' wet an' cold
in that ole cell

that kindly jailer grinned at me
all eaten up with sympathy
said "if booze wuz just a dime a bottle,
boy, you couldn't even buy the smell"

I said, "I knew there wuz sumptin'
I liked about this town
but it takes more'n that
to bring me down, down, down
for there's still alot o' wine
an' lonely girls
in this Best of all Possible Worlds"

they finally came an'a tol' me
they wuz'a a gonna set me free
an' I'd be leavin' town
if I knew whut wuz good fer me
I said "it's nice ta learn
that everybody's so concerned about my health"

I said "I won't be leavin'
no more quicker than I can
'cause I've enjoyed as about as much
o' this as I can stand
and I don't need this town o' yours
more than I never needed nothin' else

for there's still a lotta drinks
that I ain't drunk
an' lots o' pretty thoughts
that I ain't thunk
an' lawd, there's still so many lonely girls
in this Best of all Possible Worlds"