Har! Har! Har!

I bet God finds a whole lot of that stuff in the Old Testament totally insane and laughable. I know I do. And so would anyone else who was half-reasonable...

People have always interpreted holy books (and not JUST the Bible) in a manner that supported their existing views and prejudices...simply by only taking note of the specific parts they agree with, frequently out of context, and ignoring or misconstruing the rest. They have also proven highly resistant to metaphor and parable, and insisted on taking literally what was meant symbolically. Such is the habit of a lazy mind.

When it comes to the Old Testament, however, it's so extraordinarily backward, vicious, primitive, and out-of-date that one has to practice selective insanity to take it seriously as the up-to-date and relevant Word of God.