The Argument Sketch

http://www.mindspring.com/~mfpatton/sketch.htm

M: Argument is an intellectual process. Contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of any statement the other person makes.
(short pause)
A: No it isn't.
M: It is.
A: Not at all.
M: Now look.
A: (Rings bell) Good Morning.
M: What?
A:   That's it. Good morning.
M:   I was just getting interested.
A:   Sorry, the five minutes is up.
M: That was never five minutes!
A:   I'm afraid it was.
M: It wasn't.
Pause
A:   I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to argue anymore.
M: What?!
A:   If you want me to go on arguing, you'll have to pay for another five minutes.
M: Yes, but that was never five minutes, just now. Oh come on!
A: (Hums)
M: Look, this is ridiculous.
A:   I'm sorry, but I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid!
M: Oh, all right.
(pays money)
A:   Thank you.
short pause
M: Well?
A:   Well what?
M:   That wasn't really five minutes, just now.
A:    I told you, I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid.
M:   I just paid!
A:   No you didn't.
M:   I DID!
A:   No you didn't.
M: Look, I don't want to argue about that.
A: Well, you didn't pay.
M: Aha. If I didn't pay, why are you arguing? I Got you!
A:   No you haven't.
M: Yes I have. If you're arguing, I must have paid.
A:   Not necessarily. I could be arguing in my spare time.
M: Oh I've had enough of this.
A:   No you haven't.
M: Oh Shut up.