Three or four times people have phoned up my wife in desperation at their plight on being diagnosed with arthritis. In particular, the medical advice being - okay so you've got this disease - now go home and get on with it. On at least two occasions I've picked up the phone and they have had the bottle of drugs in their hand ready to kill themselves.

Basically it has been the isolation that has lead them to feel like this. In each case they have become enthusiastic members of a self help group and turned their lives around.

What killed the gay christian was not the lady's response - it was not having other people to turn to, people who had coped with and survived the mental turmoil of a similar situation.

we are not on our own, there is always love and help for us - but sometimes, we just don't know where to look for it.

Mudcat wasn't a bad call. Perhaps it will be the gateway to seeking more personal face to face help, which is really better.