Job Description for Air Marshall.

Wanted - men and women who are willing to kill mentally ill passengers who try to get off a plane. Must be able to stick together especially when fabricating reports. An ability to not be able to handle stress is a must. You will be directly responsible for security as our ground staff can't be trusted to know what they are looking for. People who engage their trigger finger before their brain preferred. Anyone with the gall to question procedure need not apply.