HAPPY JACK'S UNDRINKABLE ALE
Lyrics and Music by Stu Venable
Copyright 1992 Stu Venable

Good sailors sing songs of lassies and bravery and fortune
How the sea fills their hearts with the courage to do mighty deeds
But I'll sing a song of a sailor I met in Jamaica
Who tested the bravest of brave in all seven seas.


Happy Jack's undrinkable ale

One mighty sup puts the wind in your sail

It's Happy Jack's undrinkable ale.
Our captain once tried a tankard of Jack's mighty potion
He seemed all right so we all went off to bed
We woke to the screams of our captain way up in the crow's nest
He tried to fly with the wind and he ended up dead.

Chorus
This ale was as dark as a night with no moon in December
As bitter as a man who lost his pizzle in May
As strong as six horses, as bitter and evil as Judas
Ask the worldliest drinkers of Jack's, they'll most surely say.

Chorus
I sailed with a lad who was tall and as wide as a mountain
One half a pint put this sailor down upon one knee
We watched as he turned as white as the high cliffs of Dover
And threw-up old Jack's as a gift to the mighty blue sea.

Chorus
I once tried a thimble of Jack's demonic invention
But for the spinning I felt that I was all right
I woke with a chicken, two ducks, a lamb and an oxen
By the looks on their faces I must have had a good night.

Chorus