Little Hawk's story of the orange juice reminded me of a song by one of our favourite groups, the Shiny Bum Singers, who write and sing Work Songs of the Public Service. This one is from one of their books, The Tiny Shiny Bum Songbook

The Office Fridge

Tune: The Red Flag (O Tannenbaum, O Christmas Tree)

The office fridge is full of slime,
No-one has cleaned it in our time,
The shelves a feast of green and grey -
And what's that lurking in the tray?

Chorus:
So raise the putrid morsel high
To throw it out, or eat and die?
Though gourmets flinch and drinkers sneer,
We'll use our fridge for more than beer.

A squelchy bag of nameless gunk,
A hardened roll falls with a clunk.
A long-lost lunch, its fate is plain,
Let mankind's loss be compost's gain.

Chorus

There is milk but no-one's keen -
Fluorescent pink and lurid green.
A blackened lump, right up the back,
Provides a salmonella snack.

Chorus

The ice amid the freezer's ooze
Is broken glass that once held booze.
A reaching hand, one finger less
The final colour in the mess.

Chorus

Copyright � David Walker, 1999