I tell people I'm a "skeptical agnostic" simply because I don't like absolutes and "atheist" seems pretty absolute, but I don't believe in God, at least not in the way my Baptist and Catholic neighbors would expect.

My mother's theory is that there are precious few true believers out there, otherwise people wouldn't be cheating on their SO's, cheating on their taxes, hitting their kids, or going broke trying to keep up with the Joneses. They would be wearing sack-cloth, giving it all to the poor, and walking the straight and narrow, living in mortal fear of retribution. (She's an agnostic. My dad is a devout atheist/secular humanist. Even if they weren't my parents, I would think they were two of the finest, most honest people I've ever known, and theoretically we're all doomed.)