4/8/1887,
In New Orleans at The Charity Hospital of Louisiana
a 45-year-old patient was recorded as dying from masturbation.
(Per The Grim Reaper's Book of Days, Ed Morrow, Citadel Press, 1992)

          The first mate's name was Cooper.
          By Christ, he was a trooper.
          He jerked and jerked until he worked
          Himself into a stupor.
  
                  "The Good Ship Venus," Ed Cray, The Erotic Muse, 1992

ALSO:

 
          The king was in the counting house,
             Counting out his wealth.
          The queen was in the parlor,
             Playing with herself.
  
                  "The Ball of Kirriemuir"

Early warning notice: This series of the Happy File noncontinues beginning April 16.
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