"I'm a Wanker, I'm a Wanker
and it does me good like it Bloody well should
I'm a Wanker, I'm a Wanker
and I'm always pulling my Pud"

A gem from Ivor Biggun and the Red Nosed Burglers.

He also does one about being the World's Greatest Wanker
One bit goes soemthing like.
"I am the World's Greatest Wanker,
I'm known throughout the Land.
Everyone want's to meet me
BUT nobody want's to shake my hand."

JohnB