Oops I forgot ...

And my doubt is not "subjective and arbitrary"....it is based on 50 years of evaluating many, many ideas, claims, definitions, arguments, and supposed 'proofs'.

Yes. Even after 50 years of mental gymnastics, you are still full of doubt, still cursing the essence of your existence. Well, that's because you're using the wrong tool, Bill. You're never going to discover the truth about these matters using only your head.

THe mind is a wonderful tool, but a very poor master. Most people's minds are like runaway horses -- untrained, unrestrained and galloping full speed ahead.

Into disaster.