" found my father hiding there watching a TV."

What's wrong with that? Probably there was a certain show that he liked.

I don't have a TV and almost never watch it. My sister has one and watches (watched) only one show, "Law and Order." Another friend only watches Star Trek re-runs.

Most of the people I know don't watch TV. Recently, when our music group played the Rondeau by Mouret (the theme song for Masterpiece Theatre), I went around asking people if Masterpiece Theatre was still on the air, and all I got were blank looks.

Last week I was getting an oil change, and an emaciated mechanic in a faded TV shirt snapped, "I hate TV! I don't even own one!" So giving up on TV is not just a yuppie thing.

The big secret is that there are only 425 people left in the world who watch TV. The entire industry is merely a gigantic welfare system designed to keep money in circulation and to keep administrative assistants from starving.