Richard, if a man with your connections doesn't know how to step into dogshit.......you're obviously lacking a festival directory.

Whereas to fulfil my humble needs, I'll have to wait for the next ralph McTell tour - see if he's written anything new.

I was in my favourite coffee shop two days ago, a cafetiere of Blue Mountain was a fiver. I had the Yorkshire tea instead, I 'm a poor struggling songwhiner, you see.