I was terminally terrified until the music I longed to hear drew me to go "see" a barn dance, and a REALLY unattractive man asked me so sweetly to dance as the first dance began. How could I refuse such heart? He was a wonderful dancer and danced once with each woman who would accept his invitation. Next thing, after mine was over, I noticed how many really unlovely people were out there dancing. They danced poorly or they danced well, but they all looked so charming! And then I realized that many of the good dancers would make a point of seeking out wallflowers to welcome them to the joy of dancing. They would carefully shepherd us around and make us look good. (An experience not unlike joining a certain musically oriented online community I met recently.)

It was all quite humbling, and my fears seemed so ridiculous and petty; and I had arrived as terrified as you can imagine-- years of school teasing, etc., and trying to be completely invisible... I never got "comortable" dancing, but I danced and enjoyed it.

Then later I learned that "ballroom" dancing is not necessary even when everyone else around you is doing it. My then-fiancee (now husband) held out his hand to me, to dance at the reception for a wedding he'd just done, and all fear vanished, it was just good old us, moving around however whichway.

Changed my life... Changed my life.