This hit my inbox yesterday
(Scouse is slang for Liverpudlian ie of Liverpool UK)

Scouse Christmas Song - (to the tune of Mistletoe and Wine: ...)


Christmas time, drunkenness and crime,
Children playing - in filth and grime,
With cars all on fire - loot under the tree
Time to rejoice - in be-ing scally,
It's a time now for stealing, a time for receiving,
Knocked-off gear - oh worra great feelin
Why pay top dollar - yer can nick it for free,
Just like our lecky, - gas and TV


Christmas time, p*ssed all the time
Nicking ciggies, - spirits and wine
Wearing-shell-suits and Nykees - all knocked off gear
It's great getting p*ssed - on some other bloke's beer
Its a time now for drinkin - six packs of Stella
Dat yer got down the backs - from some dodgy Fella
Christmas is sound - Christmas is best
God bless our Cilla - and the DHSS

Christmas time - time to joy-ride
Then go and visit - family inside
With Dad on a six stretch - and sis up the duff
This 'City of Culcher' can get pretty rough
So next time your driving - through Liverpool-city
You may just know why - the streets look so sh*tty
So keep a sharp eye out - for those dodgy deals
But don't drive too slow - or we'll pinch all four wheels!


And Merry Chistmas/Xmas/Yueltide to you all.
Ian