well, I've been in Azizi's shoes - I started a thread called the need to win in the hope of getting people to rethink the need to rip into each other. While I tried to make that thread as diplomatic as possible, the only effect it had was to upset a couple catters very much.

after the dust died down, i saw that my thread was seen as being judgemental, and in effect it was because I was hoping to get people to step back from the heavy artillery in their debating.

it's pretty hard to understand where people are coming from and very easy to misinterpret people of different backgrounds. The big one for me is the dry aussie sense of humour - dry comments by aussies sometimes get taken very literally by US catters.

re using the wisdom of "long term catters - I take old timers, whether they're catters or from any other community - with a grain of salt. People can be around for a very long time, and while long term catters can be very insightful so can newer ones.

I hope your thread is more effective than mine was, Azizi, good luck.

best wishes

freda