Here's some more (I warned you!)

- The early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.

- OK, so what's the speed of dark?

- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.

- I intend to live forever - so far, so good.

- If Barbie is so popular, why do you have to buy her friends?

- I couldn't repair your brakes, so I made your horn louder.

- Why do psychics have to ask you for your name?

- If at first you don't succeed, then skydiving definitely isn't for you.

- Monday is an awful way to spend 1/7th of your life.