Many of my favorites already mentioned, but with all the mudcatters in D.C. I can't believe no one mentioned the very, very top one on my list: Susan Hills' "Sing Me Over When I Am Gone." The melody is beautiful. Having it at my going away party is the first thing I mentioned in my "last directives" (along with Och's "When I'm Gone"). Last I heard from Susan she said she didn't mind having her songs circulated, so here's a bit of it (sorry for errors, Susan):

....as I cross over Jordan I might turn back an ear,
just to hear what my old friends are singing.
How hard it will be to keep moving along,
I might stop at that river and cry.
But the songs that you sing will [put wind in my sails?]
Please sing me across when I die.

ch:
Sing me over when I am gone.
I would not linger, I would move on.
Sing me over when I am gone,
Help me to find my way home.

Oh my.

Rita Ferrara made a tape for me the Year from Hell when my health was going down the tubes, I had to move suddenly because the roof fell in during a snow storm and ruined most of my possessions (my bed was ground zero), I had a car wreck and was hospitalized, my father died, my cat died, and my shrink left me. (Yes, I know, don't feel guilty, laughter IS the best medicine.) She picked the most marvelous songs - uplifting, touching, but not maudlin or just sad - good not only for a person going through a rough patch, but many great for a funeral. If you are looking for funeral songs, grieving songs, or just comforting songs, think about Rita's list - what she included and what she didn't. People with good reason to feel bad do not want to hear "Look on the Sunny Side" claptrap, but neither do they want to hear downers. Rita's selection strikes just the right note:

-Hoboe's Lullaby (Woody Guthrie)
-Turning Toward Morning (Gordon Bok)
-Skye Boat Song (trad?)
-Mockingbird Hill!!! (very comforting)
-A trad song I can't pull in just now about making you a bower (sp?) of roses to lie in

-2 songs Rita wrote - one that basically says just hold me - and I felt like she was holding me as I listened, and one that basically says quit fighting life so hard, you need a rest - it's ok to just rest.

-And another Susan Hills song great for grieving (which she wrote for Rita):

"You've been on my mind quite a lot these days,
I hold you in the light like the Quakers say,
And so I'm writing you this song
To send my love along.

Ch:
I'll hold you in the light, lift you to the light,
be with you in the light that shines on us all.
You're walking in the light in a time of strife, but there is [light on every branch?] of the tree of life.
God send you sleep deep and nourishing,
Dreams sweet and comforting,
Lead you by rivers and fields [...sorry, can't remember]
And when you need a friend, find comfort and peace in the wind."

Bless you Rita and Susan!

A few more funeral favorites not previously mentioned: "Chariots Come Carry Me Home" (not "swing low", much cheerier), Jerry Rassmussen's "Handful of Songs," and one of the world's all-time best funeral songs: Harry Chapin's "Circle Song," esp. the lines "I've been here a thousand times ... let's go 'round one more time."

My father was a staunch Baptist, so for him I sang his favorite poem, beautifully set to music (by Sally Rogers I think), "Touch of the Master's Hand." It is maudlin, but it's a really good going away party song for someone who wasn't exactly perfect and you don't want to blow chunks while everybody lies about what a great person blah blah - it was perfect for my daddy because he did try, he wanted to be a good man.

...And then again there's always Tom Paxton's "Forest Lawn" - if you haven't heard it, look it up - especially if you are suicidally depressed.