Lyrics, chords, and attribution copied from Fretplay, with the spelling corrected and formatting slightly adjusted by me:

OH BOY DO I LOVE BEARS
Larry "Uncle Smoky" Clark

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  CHORUS: Oh boy, do I love bears! You can bet your life that I do.
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          There ain't nothin' anywhere like a big black bear
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          As long as he's a mile away from you!
  
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  Well, the first time I went campin',
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  Just a knapsack on my back,
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  I hiked ten miles into the bush
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  With a buddy by the name of Jack.
  
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  And old Jack, he was an expert.
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  He'd been campin' for a whole lot of years,
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  So all we took was some fishin' gear,
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  A skillet, and a dozen beers.

Well, the day went great. Went fishin' on the lake,
And we sure had a barrel of fun,
About ten that night, just a little bit tight,
Frying fillets in the setting sun.

Found a patch of ground, and laid our sleeping bags down,
And we crawled in for the night.
Woke up about three. Staring down at me
Was a shadow in the pale moonlight.

(NO CHORD) (THUMP three TIMES)
It was a bear!

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  Great big mother of a bear!
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  I was up in a flash; I did the ten-mile dash
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  And I never, ever went back there!

CHORUS

Well, the next time I went campin',
Took my brand-new, waterproof tent
To a campground full of people,
About the nicest place I ever went.

Had a cooler full of steaks and things
And another one full of beer.
Had plenty to eat had plenty to drink.
I could have stayed there for a year.

About two o'clock in the afternoon,
I strolled down to the lake.
I met a girl named Jan with a deep brown tan.
Oh boy, that was a break!

By ten that night we were snuggled up nice
And the tent was zipped up tight.
I woke up about three. Staring down at me
Was a shadow in the pale moonlight.

There was a great big hole
In my brand-new tent.

It was a bear! Great big mother of a bear!
I was up in a flash. I did the hundred-mile dash,
And I never, ever went back there!

CHORUS

Well, the last time I went campin',
I was invited by a friend called Jake
To a great big bear-proof cabin
On a hill overlooking a lake.

We had booze and girls and a fireplace
And music that could turn you on.
We had everything that a man could need
Except we didn't have an indoor john.

Well, late that night my stomach didn't feel right
And I knew that I had to go
Down the winding path to the little outhouse
About sixty yards or so.

Well, my knees were knockin' but I just kept walkin'
And I made it to the place all right.
When I finished my chore and opened the door,
There was a shadow in the pale moonlight.

I didn't even have time to buckle my belt!

It was a bear! Great big mother of a bear!
Soon I was runnin' through the trees
With my pants around my knees
And I never, ever went back there!

CHORUS TWICE