you overestimate the songs deppness first of all. they are all really shallow, second ofcourse he was christian all along.thirdly not a good cristian he was a rebel and a no gooder.fourth i think he ment to say that i had overgiven himself again after all he had done, beocouse he probobly hated god for what he had done to hi's first wife and unborn child.if somebody was whit him when he died, which there are no records of.and by the by nobody really know what he died of. beocuse the papers from the morg was merly half filled.