I think the deal is that women should do what they can to be discreet..and most do..but I have seen the exhibitionist ones and it is uncomfortable for others...if you are in a restaurant you can turn your chair somewhat and drape yourself with a shawl or baby blanket. It is not a situation where someone needs to forego all modesty when you are with strangers...if it is your own circle of friends do whatever...I think if people know the woman is making a reasonable effort..which gets harder as the kid gets older and squirmier..they appreciate it. mg