Don't flippin' joke about this stuff, eh? I was flippin' adducted by aleyens fer, like, almost 3 weeks and they flippin' did tests on me and everything, eh? It was brutal, man. If they had held ahold of me even one day longer I might of lost my flippin' mind! They don't drink beer! They don't eat pizza! They don't even have TV shows! They are totally flippin' inhuman, man. They never heard of Metallica! Flip me. I tried to tell them what really matters in life...beer, babes, and smokes...but would they lissen? No! They have this flippin' totally healthy society where, like, everyone spends time studyin' interesting flippin' stuff and figgerin' out how to make the flippin' planet healthier and they hardly even think about sex EVER.

You probally don't believe me, right? Well, FLIP YOU! You can kiss my flippin' winkie. I know what I know.

If them aleyens ever get to invade here and take over it will be the fault of peoples like youse who are makin' jokes and not payin' attendshun to what is goin' on around youse.

And if they do, dude, the fun will be over! No more beer. No more babes. No more wet T-shirt contests. No more monster trucks. No more wars. No more "Survivor". Nothin'.

Don't flippin' say I did not warn you, cos I just did.

- Shane McBride