I 'grokked' that first baby, and always thought of the fetus as a 'she'. Often I have wondered if the difference in the connectedness was gender related. I had the ammnio done with my 2nd pregnancy, as much because I knew I was going to need time to get my mind around the idea of a son if the baby was male. It was.

Sins - that was two years of hard labor you went through.

If my husband had not wanted children so badly, I don't think I would have cared one way or the other. It was the hormones that made me maternal, no doubt about it. He wanted to adopt, but I knew I was lacking in the maternal instinct sans the hormone bath of pregnancy.   I am still not a 'child' person.   Not a 'natural born' parent. I work very hard to be a 'good enough' (Thank you Margaret Mahler) parent, but it does not come naturally.

Keep the stories coming!

Janie