PRISON VERSUS BEING A HOUSEWIFE

* In prison you get three square meals a day.
* At home, you cook three square meals a day and try to get your kids
to eat it.

* In prison you get an hour each day in the yard to exercise and mingle.
* At home you get to clean the yard up so you can mow it so your kids
can spread more toys all over it so that you can go out and clean it
again because little Jr. can't sleep without his latest Lego creation.

* In prison you get to watch TV, cable even.
* At home you get to listen to your children fight over the remote
control and get treated to hours and hours of mindless cartoons
thanks to cable.

* In prison you can read whatever you want and attend college for free.
* At home you get to read weekly readers staring Dick, Jane and Spot and worry about how to send Jr. to college and still be able to eat for the next twenty years.

* In prison all your medical care is free.
* At home you have to pawn your mother's silver and fill out trillions
of papers for insurance and hope the doctor will see you before you
die.

* In prison, if you have visitors, all you do is go to a room, sit, talk and then say good-bye when you are ready or your time is up.
* At home you get to clean for days advance and then cook and clean up
after your guests and hope that they will one day leave.

* In prison you can spend your free time writing letters or just hang
out in your own space all day.
* At home you get to clean your space and everyone else's space too and what the hell is free time again?

* In prison there are no screaming or whining children or spouses asking you to do something else for them, or screaming at you because you didn't.
* At home.... stop me when I get to the downside of jail, will ya?