Bill-
I guess what I object to is the apparent interchangeability of "respect" and "understand". I can certainly understand (at least intellectually) most people's beliefs and opinions, but I'm damned if I feel compelled to respect them.
    It's not feasible, I'm afraid, to deal rationally with positions that one feels are irrational. This, of course, doen's mean that politeness isn't a good idea.