Speaking of salve for suffering egos....I have some for sale here. Yup, I have a whole crate of Alfonso's Suffering Ego Salve, copyrighted in 1905. You "can't hardly" find that stuff anymore, you know. It's worth its weight in...well...all kinds of valuable stuff. Really valuable stuff.

I was thinking of selling it on Ebay and making BIG BUCKS, but I'm going to give you people first shot at it.

$25 a tin. That's a good deal! PM me while it lasts!