It's that bouffant hairdo. Bugs have crawled into your ear and eaten around behind it and are now trying to eat their way out via your eardrum. I know, because this happened to someone at work's aunt's cousin's best friend's boy friend's acquaintance, who happens to be a hairdresser's assistant and he heard about it from his employer's nurse's doctor's brother's veterinarian's kennel cleaner. You should have given that hairstyle up in the 1960s, but it's too late now, probably, because all the hairspray has solidified into a mass even a bullet won't penetrate. This isn't all bad, because thousands of years from now archeologists will be able to examine your hair long after the rest of you is dust. In fact, you hair will survive the eventual collapse and re-Big Banging of the Universe. And you'll show up at Judgement Day balder'n a coot, because your hair won't be able to make it.