The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #105634   Message #2177332
Posted By: Nickhere
23-Oct-07 - 11:34 AM
Thread Name: BS: Amazing conversation with a 19 yr. old..
Subject: RE: BS: Amazing conversation with a 19 yr. old..
Greg B: "To me if a woman is old enough to conceive a child, she's old
enough to make her own decision about sexual intercourse (or
not), and old enough to be offered a woman's universal right
to determine, by whatever means, the disposition of her own
body"

There have been cases of 12-year old girls conceiving - do you consider them old enough to "make decision's about her own body and its disposition"? Just because a child / girl / woman is physically capable of becoming pregnant at a given age, it doesn't follow that they should. Perhaps thousands of years ago when life spans rarely went beyond 40 and people had to get their living done early, such a thing might have been feasible but times have changed and society expects different things now. We spend almost a quarter of our lives in education and at least a similar amount of time before most people even get married. Having to take care of a child puts such a young mother at a disadvantage (I know because I have seen it first hand as well as having studied up on it). It is not a disadvantage that can't be overcome with enough of the right kind of support from friends and family, but that isn't always on offer.

As supposedly "grown-ups" we have a duty to look after our younger memebers of society to ensure they get the best possible start in life and the rigth kind of direction. We don't let kids of 12 drive cars on the public roads, or smoke or drink, though many of them are able to do so physically (and indeed do so). The point is that there is a big difference between being physically capable of something and emotionally and psychologically ready to take responsibility for the possible consequences. as the say goes "any old fool of a man can make a child, it takes a real man to raise one" We do not consider children up to this level of maturity and so try and keep them as far as possible from harm's way until they develop that maturity enough to look out for themselves. A typical comment I've heard from many women is that they wish they hadn't let their boy'friend' pressure them into having sex when they were young on the blackmail that the love would stop otherwise. Only a more grown-up woman can spot that kind of nonsense, so it makes sense to try and teach and protect our kids too.

Despite the fact that kids may do things they would be better off not doing, I disagree with giving out contraception to younger kids on principle. I think it does tend to give kids the impression that such behaviour is at least not frowned upon and is ok, when this is not in their best interests. I know many kids will experiment with all the wrong stuff anyway (I am living proof of that) but it doens't help if no-one from the grown up world to whom they consciously or unconciosuly seek guidance, does not set limits.

Another approach would be for society to send out avery strong and unequivocal message that sex at too young an age is not good for those involved - emotionally, psychologically or physically. That's not happening at present if you take a look at what passes for entertainment etc etc., Underage pregnancies etc., will only reduce in incidence if the 'water' of society as a whole in which these 'fish' swim undertakes a shake-up of its attitudes.