It's a lovely sunny day here at Lytham St Annes & I'm wanting to go out for my daily consitutional, but owing to a partcularly nasty bout of the diarr-horrors I find myself house-bound for the duration. So, fellow Mudcatters might I ask:

1) Any homespun remedies?

and, failing that:

2) Any choice euphemisms for the condition I might otherwise call Laughing Gravy?