Good lord.

You know, Dave's Wife, there is a bit of that sort of thing going on here at Mudcat too, although to a much lesser extent. What I mean is, there are individuals here who develop a grudge against whoever, and they are then apparently willing to go painstakingly through every post that someone has made in order to pick up "clues", as you put it, so that they can make nasty personal attacks on their chosen target. It happens. I've seen it happen now and then.

Fortunately it does not happen to nearly the extent you have described in your post above.

Anyone who posts personal information on any forum like this one is risking a certain amount of toxic attention from various predatory people. It's very similar to poison pen gossip in a small town, and it goes around and around and around.