The elves have taken charge of a package and it is now en route to you. How long it will take depends on the drinking habits of the elves as well as weather conditions and the mood of the reindeer, but I'm hoping you'll receive it well before the Actual Day.   We're also a little dependent on the good will of the customs officials, having fudged the customs label to some extent, but we have crossed fingers that all will go well.

Do not open ahead of time ...or all will turn to ashes and cinders ...

Your well-disposed
Santa