Bear in mind, K, that the maturation curve in males -- especially in this culture -- often lags well behind that of females of the same chronological age. So if you want heart-smart, you may need to look to men who have learned how to take some responsibility in the world, maybe had some hard times or learned what loss and risk are really all about. At least, the percentages are better. I know from recent experience that it is possible to find a sensitive and competent (both!) HS-age or thereabouts Western male, but it is almost amazing when it happens. Try looking among musicians rather than Marines -- they have rather a different perspective on the topic! :>)

Amos