The Mudcat Café TM
Thread #24822   Message #2277549
Posted By: Jim Dixon
02-Mar-08 - 02:52 PM
Thread Name: Lyr Req: The Ranter
Subject: Lyr Add: RANTING PARSON AND THE CUNNING FARMER'S..
Here's the text from the broadside:

THE RANTING PARSON; AND THE CUNNING FARMER'S WIFE.

1. It's of a sly ranting parson, for preaching he lived in great fame;
In the town of ----* did dwell, though I dare not to mention his name.
Likewise a jolly young farmer, a neighbour who lived hard by;
And soon on the wife of the farmer the ranter he cast a quick eye.
It's fal de ral, &c.

2. While the farmer his business did mind and rose with the lark in the morn,
The ranter was forming a plan how to crown the young farmer with horns;
And he oft to the farmer would go, to preach for the good of his soul,
But when you have heard of the joke, I'll warrant you say it was droll.

3. The ranter if you had but seen, you'd have thought he was free from all evil;
But as pure as snow-drift without, within was as black as the devil.
One day as the farmer was out, thinks he, "I shall gain my desire",
And unto the house he did start and sat himself down by the fire.

4. He says, "My dear lady, I'm told that your husband won't come home tonight.
I value not silver or gold if I can but enjoy my delight."
"O then," she replied with a smile, "my husband is gone for a week."
The ranter he little did think how she meant for to play him a trick.

5. This lady she laughed in her sleeve, and modestly hung down her head.
She said, "While my husband is out, you are welcome to [illegible; 'come to my bed'?]."
The ranter was pleased to the [life?], to think how he soon should be blest
By crowning the farmer with horns--but now comes the cream of the jest.

6. When all things were silent at night, she whispered these sounds in his ear:
"The best bed it stands in the parlour, and you must go to it, my dear.
When you are safe got to bed, my dear, I will come with all speed."
"All right", says the ranter. "Make haste"; and thus was the bargain agreed.

7. The ranter he jumped into bed and there lay as snug as you please.
The lady slipped into the garden and brought in a fine hive of bees.
She carried them into the parlour and threw them down slap on the floor.
So nimbly then she ran out and on him she lockèd the door.

8. The bees began buzzing about. The ranter he jumped on the floor.
So sweetly he capered and danced while they stung him behind and before.
Till at length he got out of the window, since no other way he could find.
His clothes he ne'er stopped for to take, but was glad for to leave them behind.

9. All smart and sore with the stings, he ran home to his wife in his shirt,
Such a figure of fun for to see, all besmeared with the mud and the dirt.
Next morning the farmer came home, as I for truth have been told,
In one of the ranter's side pockets found thirty bright sovereigns in gold.

10. The ranter he got in disgrace. The farmer he laughed at the joke,
To think how the ranter would look without breeches, waistcoat or coat.
The ranter he frets and he pines all for the loss of the money,
And the farmer, though he lost his bees, thinks he is well paid for his honey.

[*The dash is in the original.]