"There are people (and we all know and love some of them) whose whole persona is built on old victimization, and not just here. Hardi and I spend most of every day trying to aim several people's eyes outta the muck they insist in wallowing in. D'ya think if they ever got off their personal soapboxes..."

Hmmm...Sounds like victimizing the victim to me. What did these kids do to deserve a mass grave? I doubt if they had much time to wallow in self-pity. I'm sorry if you think that people suck your time and energy but maybe you are offerring too little, too late.


In that part of my post I was not referring to victims of abuse per se but to the general cultural rush to negativity that is so widespread.

But as far as sympathies for victims, there is no help for them in reinforcing their sense of continuing victimization, once they are in a safe place and can start the healing process. The healing process of course includes telling the story, but if the listener or counselor can only respond with reinforcement, the victim can stay stuck there. A guided word to the safer aspects of reality aids recovery quite a bit. (Anyone who has counseled on incest memorioes knows this.)


Back to the Pope-- since the outrage is so great, the feeling is common that whatever anyone does now is too little, too late. No one with that mindset will EVER be satisfied with ANY positive step, because it will never FEEL like "enough." But steps are, by definition, small and slow. How else does change happen without cataclysm?

~Susan