Somehow, all of this just brought to mind an old tune from jazz/blues performer, Mose Allison:

You're sittin' there yakkin' right in my face,
I guess I'm gonna have to put you in your place.
You know if silence was golden,
You couldn't raise a dime,
Because your mind is on vacation and your mouth is workin' overtime.

You're quotin' figures and droppin' names,
You're tellin' stories about the dames.
You're over-laughin' when things ain't funny,
You tryin' to sound like big money.
If talk was criminal, you'd lead a life o' crime,
Because your mind is on vacation and your mouth is workin' overtime.

You know that life is short; talk is cheap,
Don't be making promises that you can't keep.
If you don't like this song I'm singing, just grin and bear it.
All I can say is if the shoe fits wear it.
And if you must keep talkin', please try to make it rhyme,
Because your mind is on vacation and your mouth is working overtime."