Ebbie - "I suspect that another reason why males - young or not - fear contact with gay mals is that they are afraid they would have a physical response and fear that that would mean that they too must be gay."

In some cases that may indeed be so, Ebbie. I couldn't say in how many cases. No idea, really. I certainly never had any such fears myself, but I guess some males do. I think, however, that what mainly scares most young males about homosexuality is simply that it's outside of the boundaries of how they are consciously trying to "define" themselves. They're trying to build a young adult identity at that point, trying to leave childhood behind, and working hard to fit into their new identity, and it's a somewhat fragile identity. They're trying to become comfortable in their own skins and figure out how to deal with girls, courtship, etc. They naturally feel threatened by anything that leads off in other directions from the identity they are imagining for themselves.

That's why they're also scared to dress differently from their peers, talk differently from their peers, or do anything else that's different from their peers. That's why they insult anyone who does something different by calling him "gay". They don't really mean he's homosexual, usually, they just mean that he's not doing it "the usual way", whatever "the usual way" is.

Young men are extreme conformists within their own age group, and they feel deeply threatened by those who don't conform. Gays don't conform to the mainstream sexual values.

I don't think there's much more to it than that.

Now, you also said: "Before the slapping upside my head begins, let me share a further thought here: In my opinion, perhaps the most potent aphrodisiac is becoming aware that someone else is sexually aroused."

Seriously???? Well, if I can speak for myself here...realizing that someone else is sexually aroused toward me only seems to work for me if I am already attracted to that person or if I would normally find them quite sexually attractive regardless. I don't find men attractive in that way, period...and it would definitely creep me out if I realized that a man was sexually attracted to me. I wouldn't mind if he was emotionally fond of me and said so...I wouldn't even mind if he had a romantic interest in me and just calmly told me about it (as one friend did once over a cup of coffee...and I'd had no idea he was gay until that moment). No big deal. But if I felt a sudden wave of physical lust emanating from another man toward me (and one does feel stuff like that)...it would definitely creep me out. I don't get turned on when I'm creeped out.

And guess what? I've felt waves of lust like that from women too...and if they were women I was not necessarily attracted to (of which there are plenty), then I did not find it to be an aphrodisiac at all...I found it to be something that made me feel uncomfortable, made me want to step back and put some distance between me and her. Sex is not a "casual" matter to me. It's a serious matter of real intimacy. Do you know how many people I want to get that intimate with? Very few.

Maybe I'm shy. Or maybe I'm just a lot choosier than some. ;-) I've always believed in love.