One more verse:

Now we got a new policeman t'other week
A sloppy sort of fellow so to speak
One that thought he was all there
But by gum I do declare
He was what you might have termed a living freak.
All the neighbours say as how he's off his chump.
T'other night he came across a biggish lump
He said, "Hold on, you're tight."
But when he shone his light,
Why the fathead he was talking to the pump.

[Chorus]
To the pump, the village pump
The village pump pump pump pump pump.
The village pump, the village pump
The village pump pump pump pump pump.

Words & Music by Arthur Naish