I want to say that I accept this nomination and would like to lay out my platform, unless I can find a young intern better looking than Monica, which shouldn't be hard, although other things are, that I could lay out instead.

First though, you should know that I am not a crook ...... anymore. I stand for the rights of all, and often to take a leak, although age has made sitting a viable option. I will fight to have a guitar in every pot, pot in every guitar, whisky in the jar, and a jar on every porch.

And now I wish to provide you members of the fourth estate, regardless of whether or not you have a member, with this photo opp as I kiss the babes..........Just bring 'em on in here and....................say what?.........babies?........BABIES????......... Not babes huh?..............uh....... yeah, right............Well just fock this whole thing for a row of soldiers.................

Spaw